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Tales from the cabinet shop/wood shop.

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17K views 267 replies 32 participants last post by  DS 
#1 · (Edited by Moderator)
Anyone who does woodworking for a living surely has lots of interesting stories to tell.

I will start with a few of my own. Feel free to add yours and we can all benefit from each other's experiences.

First story:

"Captain Tacos"

Whenever I meet a new client for the first time, I try to make a point to learn their names.
It shows respect and personalizes the experience of designing custom cabinets and prevents embarrassment of a bad spelling or wrong name on dozens of pages of drawings and contracts.

So, this new client had a name that was Greek to me, which made perfect sense, because in fact, he was Greek.

All I remember of his last name was that it started with the letter K, had far too many vowels and strange letters in it and did not sound anything like it was spelled.
The client pronounced it the way you might say "Captain Tacos" if you removed all the letter T's.
This is wrong, but it is something like "Kapenacos" (sp).

We designed a household of custom cabinets for this wonderfully Greek client and when the paperwork hit the shop, all kinds of interesting pronunciations came forth when attempting to talk about this job.

As I explained it to you, is how I explained it to the shop foreman - Captain Tacos without the T's.
Before long though, everyone in the shop was working on and talking about the "Captain Tacos" job.

As is often customary on a large custom job, periodic shop tours to verify progress for bank draws, etc, are a common occurrence.

On this day, it was Mr. Kapenacos' turn to tour the shop, see our progress on his build, and meet some of the craftsmen working on his project.

Even though the shop foreman knew how to pronounce "Kapenacos"(sp), they had been saying "Captain Tacos" so much in the shop, that he slipped and called the client Captain Tacos to his face!
I almost died!

Fortunately, Mr. Kapenacos has been dealing with the name problem most of his life and was entirely amused with this "Americanism" of his name.

What a relief, as I feared it might have gone entirely in a different direction.
 
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#4 · (Edited by Moderator)
Next story:

"Refried beans"

Back in 1998, my boss asked me to evaluate a business plan proposal for a new custom cabinet shop.
At the time, we were designing, selling and installing semi-custom modular cabinetry and contracting custom cabinets from a local custom shop.

The boss wanted to bring the full custom work in house and had the budget to do it.

Opening a new custom wood shop from scratch is a daunting task.
Most shops start with a couple of guys working out of a small rental space with basic tools and they organically build the operation up over several years.

We started with nothing but a business plan and a budget.
We bought an empty building, outfitted it with electricity, compressed air and dust collection.
Then, we filled it with new state of the art CNC machinery, workstations and finishing equipment.
We hired analysts to evaluate our shop work flow for bottlenecks and inefficiencies.

Our help wanted ad hit the local papers the day we officially hung out the shingle.

Amazingly, there was a line of about 35 candidates lined up at our door within minutes of opening.

It didn't take long for us to figure out why we had such a line at our front door that morning, as not one person in line had any real woodworking experience.

As it turns out, we opened our new shop in the post NAFTA trade agreement era when companies were moving south from Arizona in record numbers where there was a more favorable business regulatory environment.
(Insert loud sucking noise here)

Our new building shared a rear property line with the Rosarita refried bean factory, which, coincidentally had opened a new factory in Mexico and closed its USA factory doors just the day before.

The only "woodworking" experience that any of the barely English speaking candidates had was packing cans of refried beans into cardboard boxes and loading trucks with a forklift.

In the end, it took nearly two years before we comfortably filled all of our key positions in the shop,with adequately experienced people.

We actually hired several of the bean packers and a few of them took the challenge seriously to learn the woodworking business and they became some of our best and most loyal people.

I have to say that when we started out with a handful of pages of a business plan, we had little idea that our biggest challenge would be to hire and train a qualified staff of reliable workers.
 
#7 ·
"Murphy wins again"

I had just finished all the paperwork to put a job into production. Seven complete copies were made so that each department could have their own set to work with.

I had just gotten back from distributing those copies when my phone rang. It was the client.
"I think we are going to change our minds again about the color, is it too late?"

No, it was not too late. I just had to retrieve all of the paperwork I just distributed and change the color.

I was very meticulous that the old color didn't even appear on a page crossed out. I made all new paperwork and redistributed it.

A couple of weeks go by and the job is done, sitting on the loading dock, when the QA guy, (every shop should have one) comes into my office and pronounces, "It's the wrong color!"

I go back to the dock and sure enough, it's the old color selection from just before that phone call.

So I track down the lead finisher who prepares the colors and ask him, "Where did you get this color? It's not anywhere on your paperwork."

He walks me back to my office and points to a white board where I was keeping track of the jobs in progress as they go through the shop. Sure enough, written in dry erase marker is the old color.

Unbeknownst to me, the finisher was ignoring his paperwork and was coming into my office to see the colors on my whiteboard because it was "easier".
Never mind that there are seven copies with who knows how many notations of the correct color, no one looked at it until it was ready to ship out the door.

Bad information is like a virus.

Unfortunately, the old color was very dark and the new color was fairly light, so we couldn't' even salvage the job.
We offered to discount the darker cabinets, but the client wouldn't have it.

We ended up eating the entire job and ended up remaking the whole thing.

Freakin' Murphy's law wins again.
 
#8 ·
I once found a mouse nest with short pencils. Apparently the mouse thief was taking them off my bench at night.
I do remember feeling uneasy about never having short pencils. Relieved to find the nest

I once turned around to find some guy standing in my shop that was fleeing the police. I quickly let him out the gate before my dog figured out we have a intruder. The police took him down in the street in front of the shop.
 
#9 ·
"Murphy wins again"

I had just finished all the paperwork to put a job into production. Seven complete copies were made so that each department could have their own set to work with.

I had just gotten back from distributing those copies when my phone rang. It was the client.
"I think we are going to change our minds again about the color, is it too late?"

No, it was not too late. I just had to retrieve all of the paperwork I just distributed and change the color.

I was very meticulous that the old color didn't even appear on a page crossed out. I made all new paperwork and redistributed it.

A couple of weeks go by and the job is done, sitting on the loading dock, when the QA guy, (every shop should have one) comes into my office and pronounces, "It's the wrong color!"

I go back to the dock and sure enough, it's the old color selection from just before that phone call.

So I track down the lead finisher who prepares the colors and ask him, "Where did you get this color? It's not anywhere on your paperwork."

He walks me back to my office and points to a white board where I was keeping track of the jobs in progress as they go through the shop. Sure enough, written in dry erase marker is the old color.

Unbeknownst to me, the finisher was ignoring his paperwork and was coming into my office to see the colors on my whiteboard because it was "easier".
Never mind that there are seven copies with who knows how many notations of the correct color, no one looked at it until it was ready to ship out the door.

Bad information is like a virus.

Unfortunately, the old color was very dark and the new color was fairly light, so we couldn't' even salvage the job.
We offered to discount the darker cabinets, but the client wouldn't have it.

We ended up eating the entire job and ended up remaking the whole thing.

Freakin' Murphy's law wins again.

- DS
One of those spec jobs. Did you end up selling the original run?
 
#10 ·
I once found a mouse nest with short pencils. Apparently the mouse thief was taking them off my bench at night.
I do remember feeling uneasy about never having short pencils. Relieved to find the nest

I once turned around to find some guy standing in my shop that was fleeing the police. I quickly let him out the gate before my dog figured out we have a intruder. The police took him down in the street in front of the shop.

- Aj2
i hear ya,once i was in the shop,garage,.and the roll up was up and this young guy came barging in the door,asking what time it was? i had my hand on my hammer on my belt ready for whatever his intentions were and i said it's .. then i said dont ever do that to someone again because the result may not be as easy as you just recieved!
 
#11 ·
One of those spec jobs. Did you end up selling the original run?

- Foghorn
I am fairly certain they were sold for salvage to a dealer who regularly bought our screw-ups.
We didn't have the space to store much else outside our normal production runs.

We were able to reuse drawer boxes, guides and hinges as well as any specialty hardware like pullouts and lazy susans.

Still, that was about $25k down the hole…
 
#12 ·
A little bit different kind of story, but one I always remember.
This is about the bravery of 1st Responders

I first started working in a production cabinet shop (1977)
As to the size, they did about 5 full kitchens a day. Assembly dept, Door dept, sanding dept, finish dept, etc etc…

I worked the nail bench, building boxes which was next to the finish department. The finish department had a rotating line, you put the cabinet on the line, it would go through several stations and come off the line ready to hang doors and drawers.

I always heard the stories that if the finish department caught fire there would be an explosion and the percussion would pretty much blow you right through a brick wall. Well, one day smoke started coming out of the finish area. Everyone evacuated the shop.

By the time the fire department got there, black smoke was billowing out the big roll up door like the whole building was fully engulfed. I just kept waiting for the explosion any second.

Those firemen marched right into the building like it was just another day. After about 5 minutes they came out dragging a 55 gallon can full of dirty stain rags smoking like a chimney.

So no explosion, but a testament to the bravery of those guys and what they do everyday.
Hats off to 1st responders.
 
#13 ·
It can sure be scary when it seems everything is going up in flames.

It takes a special breed to be a fire fighter.
 
#14 ·
"Cat trap"

One day we got a call from a customer saying she needed us to go out and repair her cabinets.

She had an L shaped kitchen and, against my advice, placed a double oven in the corner on an angle.
This design wasted a lot of space behind the oven and made the ovens dominate the room aesthetically.

When we got there to see what needed repairing, there was a huge hole "chopped" out of the finished end panel at the side of the oven cabinet.

It seems the cat had climbed up on top of the oven cabinet and either fell, or jumped into one of the triangular voids behind the oven.
When the cat couldn't get out it complained loudly.

It took the homeowner some time to figure out where the cat was, but, once located, they quickly determined there was no easy way to get it out.

So, they called the fire department, who as you know, likes to extract things with axes.

We ended repairing the end panel and covering all the voided corners at the top of the oven cabinet .

Now we have a policy: Don't design cat traps.
 
#15 ·
And there's the plumber who put the drain in the slab in the wrong place. SOOOOO the island sink would not work. Job super said "Don't worry. We'll fix it." Guess that he jack hammered the slab to move the drain.
Just glad I hadn't measured wrong. (I've never done that…...hmmmm).
 
#16 ·
It seems anymore that builders get it somewhere close to the island and just plan on moving the island plumbing each time.
Or, are least it seems that way.

Sometimes they get lucky and it lands where it shows on the plans.
 
#17 ·
So I track down the lead finisher who prepares the colors and ask him, "Where did you get this color? It's not anywhere on your paperwork."

He walks me back to my office and points to a white board where I was keeping track of the jobs in progress as they go through the shop. Sure enough, written in dry erase marker is the old color.

- DS
Part of QA is confirming SOP is being followed. It sounds like in your instance it was more of an HR function if an SOP was in place. ISO 9001 implementation should have prevented that.
 
#18 ·
So I track down the lead finisher who prepares the colors and ask him, "Where did you get this color? It's not anywhere on your paperwork."

He walks me back to my office and points to a white board where I was keeping track of the jobs in progress as they go through the shop. Sure enough, written in dry erase marker is the old color.

- DS

Part of QA is confirming SOP is being followed. It sounds like in your instance it was more of an HR function if an SOP was in place. ISO 9001 implementation should have prevented that.

- bigblockyeti
Yeh, you're right, but, we weren't that sophisticated yet… Hindsight and all that.
 
#19 ·
Was finishing customers attic. We'd put the insulation in with the side tabs stapled on the edges of the rafters so the sheetrock would form a seal - all per code.

We come in the next day and notice that the insulation had been removed and reinserted with the tabs on sides of the rafters. This left gaps between the edges of the insulation and the rafters and pushed the insulation tighter to the sheathing increasing air leakage and reducing the insulation efficiency.

Cust had "corrected" our "mistake" and redid it the way he'd seen a union crew do it.

We left it alone.
 
#20 ·
Insulation is a tough job. I try to avoid it at all costs.
Itchy, itchy, itchy!

Funny how the client was so invested in doing it the wrong way that they even got close to the itchy-ness(sp?) that is insulation.

If I thought it was wrong, I'd be like, hey, fix it!
Then you could tell me it is code and I'd be like, really? Okay.

I'm not touching it.
 
#21 · (Edited by Moderator)
Sometimes it's better to be lucky than good.

I launched my business in 2012 and the local economy was still in recovery mode. So when my business partner landed a custom bookcase job from a family friend that was good. When that project was upgraded into curved face frames, built-in LED lighting and a price tag that left us a reasonable profit margin, that was great. Getting a showpiece in the portfolio and getting paid to do so is a huge boost for a newly-formed custom woodshop.

A word of advice for future business owners: standardize your written communication and sketching methodology with your business partner before tackling a big project.

So my business partner does the field measure while I work on the 3D sketches. Eventually, the client approves a design and I create a complete 3d model, CAD files for the new CNC and working drawings for the shop. Everything is drawn up perfectly and goes together exactly as planned. Curved doors from Walzcraft match our steam-bent face frames. The CNC does a great job creating curved crown moldings. The client's electrician installs a switched outlet and gets it in exactly the right location.

On install day we loaded up our tools, the two curved side cases and the three bookshelf units and got everything unloaded at the client's home.

Here's the finished project.



Anyone guess what's wrong with that picture?

"On install day we loaded up our tools, the two curved side cases and the three bookshelf units…"

Somehow my business partner and I managed to arrive at different dimensions between what he sketched and what I drafted on the computer. So on that first install day, there was a gaping hole in the middle of the bookshelves. After wasting time trying to figure out where we had messed up, we realized the hole was exactly the size of a bookcase unit. A few apologies later and a promise to return soon with an extra bookcase, we left to go build a 4th bookshelf unit.

By the time we setup to build a duplicate bookcase and purchased another very expensive LED fixture, the profit margin was shot. But we did get a very happy client. The 4th unit slid into place with barely a 1/16" to spare and the finished project shows no sign of any mistakes.

I'm not saying it can never happen but since that day, my company has never messed up another field measure.
 
#22 · (Edited by Moderator)
I have worked in numerous cabinet shops, from a Dad N Son operation (where I learned the ropes), to very high end furniture. I have about 90 or so computer work-stations that used to be in the World trade Center to my credit, as one example. I was also part of the Team that built the handrail (very complicated) that circumnavigated the Commodities Trading Floor in the World Trade Center.

Anyway, I was in need of work, and there was a new Korean outfit in town so I applied there. This was before Ikea worldwide, and just about when Asian operators took over the US market. I got the job, maybe 8bucks an hour, somethin like that. All the stock came prefab from Korea, our job was to assemble it in a production line. Just screws, no glue. There were about 4 caucasians, the rest Koreans. I got teamed up with their fastest guy at the top of the line assembling the carcasses. Working as a unit like that, two guys can be quite fast, you spur eachother on. Him and I were doing about 90 cabs a day; the other guys fit the hardware and such. One day we see "experts" come in to assess the Line. 90 cabs a day wasnt good enough. The Line was re-worked to maximize production. Afterward, me and my partner were pushing out around 120 cabs per day, and we were hustling. That still wasnt good enough. I quit when I was told I needed to be faster yet.
 
#23 ·
"Green frog"

When you work in the office of a cabinet shop, you look out for signs that things are going wrong in the shop.

A loud bang, the ring of a saw blade after a kickback, the whine of an overtaxed router motor, or the shouting of employees will really get your attention.

This one day, there was quite a ruckus in the shop and I went to investigate.
I encountered one of our younger workers with blood running down the side of his head.

Across the shop was one of our older workers being restrained by his coworkers. He was furiously shouting (in Spanish) at the young kid and was attempting to get free from his coworkers to finish his assault.

The older fellow had apparently struck the kid in the head with a hammer.

The situation calmed down and we tried to assess what happened and why.

Apparently, the kid had hurled a verbal insult at the old man which set him off into a rage.

Now, I know there are cultural differences between myself and these two men, but, to this day, I don't understand how this was insulting.

What did he say to set him off?

He called him a "Green frog".

Does that have any special significance in Spanish?
I still don't know, but the kid was lucky he dodged the hammer just enough that it was a glancing blow to the head instead of a direct shot.

He declined to press charges and the police were not called.
They surprisingly got along pretty well after that too.

Like I said, there are cultural differences that I might never understand.
 
#25 ·
"Green frog" ….. - DS
Thanks for laugh. I think I know why they started fighting?

Language is funny thing. Especially the translation of idioms and colloquialism. Would love to know the actual phrase used. Was it simply 'rana verde' (green frog)?

Rana 'Frog' or las Ranas 'Frogs' is used in many colloquial meanings.
Usually meant as slang for 'farm animal' or worse 'dirty slimy animal'.

'cuando las ranas críen pelo' translates into 'when frogs grow hair '
but really meant as the idiom insult; 'when pigs learn to fly', or 'when cows come home'

'salió rana' translates into 'frog come out'
but usually means; 'was a big disappointment'
or I was told once, polite way to say 'useless pile of excrement'

Making things even more difficult; Many regions of Mexico and S. America have old indigenous languages, with mashup of Portuguese and Sanskrit influences. Where 'rana' (frog?) can also be used to mean war or battle.

FWIW - Worked setting up Mexico mfg operations off/on for couple decades of my career, and ran across all kinds of strange slang insults, often directed towards this Klutz ******************************. Have not visited for many years now, so my Spanglish to Mexican slang is muy malo, or very bad.
But I could easily see something like 'rana verde' (green frog) being used to mean;
'illegal immigrant (green card holding) slimy stinky farm animal'; or some other nefarious insult. LOL

Cheers!
 
#26 ·
Sometimes it s better to be lucky than good.

I launched my business in 2012 and the local economy was still in recovery mode. So when my business partner landed a custom bookcase job from a family friend that was good. When that project was upgraded into curved face frames, built-in LED lighting and a price tag that left us a reasonable profit margin, that was great. Getting a showpiece in the portfolio and getting paid to do so is a huge boost for a newly-formed custom woodshop.

A word of advice for future business owners: standardize your written communication and sketching methodology with your business partner before tackling a big project.

So my business partner does the field measure while I work on the 3D sketches. Eventually, the client approves a design and I create a complete 3d model, CAD files for the new CNC and working drawings for the shop. Everything is drawn up perfectly and goes together exactly as planned. Curved doors from Walzcraft match our steam-bent face frames. The CNC does a great job creating curved crown moldings. The client s electrician installs a switched outlet and gets it in exactly the right location.

On install day we loaded up our tools, the two curved side cases and the three bookshelf units and got everything unloaded at the client s home.

Here s the finished project.



Anyone guess what s wrong with that picture?

"On install day we loaded up our tools, the two curved side cases and the three bookshelf units…"

Somehow my business partner and I managed to arrive at different dimensions between what he sketched and what I drafted on the computer. So on that first install day, there was a gaping hole in the middle of the bookshelves. After wasting time trying to figure out where we had messed up, we realized the hole was exactly the size of a bookcase unit. A few apologies later and a promise to return soon with an extra bookcase, we left to go build a 4th bookshelf unit.

By the time we setup to build a duplicate bookcase and purchased another very expensive LED fixture, the profit margin was shot. But we did get a very happy client. The 4th unit slid into place with barely a 1/16" to spare and the finished project shows no sign of any mistakes.

I m not saying it can never happen but since that day, my company has never messed up another field measure.

- JAAune
I have a tendency to spend a lot of energy calculating radii and complicated geometry perfectly, only to mess up simple addition and subtraction.

You were fortunate to have a good fix for this one. Sometimes, I am not so lucky.

It looks real nice, btw. Circles are fun.
 
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