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772 Posts
Just in Case You are a Senior and Get a Check for $250…

By end of this year, seniors will again receive an Economic Stimulus payment.

This is a very exciting program.

I'll explain it using the Q and A format:
Q. What is an Economic Stimulus payment?
A. It is money that the federal government will send to taxpayers.
Q. Where will the government get this money?
A. From taxpayers..
Q. So the government is giving me back my own money?
A. Only a smidgen.
Q. What is the purpose of this payment?
A. The plan is for you to use the money to purchase a high-definition TV set, thus stimulating the economy.
Q. But isn't that stimulating the economy of Asia ?
A. Shut up or you don't get your check.

Below is some helpful advice on how to best help the US economy by spending your stimulus check wisely:

1. If you spend the stimulus money at Wal-Mart, your money will go to China .
2. If you spend it on gasoline, your money will go to Saudi Arabia .
3. If you purchase a computer, it will go to India
4. If you purchase fruit and vegetables, it will go to Mexico, Honduras or Guatemala .
5. If you buy a car, it will go to Japan or Korea .
6. If you purchase useless plastic stuff, it will go to Taiwan .
7. If you pay off your credit cards, or buy stock, it will go to pay management bonuses and be hidden in offshore accounts.

Or, you can keep the money in America by:

1. spending it at yard sales, flea markets, or craft shows, or
2. going to baseball or football games, or
3. hiring prostitutes, or
4. buying cheap beer or
5. getting tattoos.
These are the only wholly-American- owned businesses still operating in the US .

The best way to stimulate the economy is to go to a ball game with a prostitute that you met at a yard sale and drink beer all day until you're drunk enough to go get tattooed.

667 Posts
I like your thinking. We just have to let the stimulus come and we will handle the rest. The federal government proved that in 1999 when they took over the Mustang Ranch in Nevada for back taxes and racketeering. The hand writing was on the wall then. Federal government lost money on the venture. Proving that they can tax it, just can't run it. Who loses money sellin' whiskey????? LOL :>))

1,123 Posts
Sorry guys, the senate just turned it down. So now if you want to pay to play it has to come from your after tax $$$$ which will probably be taxed again with possible exception of the lady of the evening, unless she is a govt. employee.
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