LumberJocks

Clamp it Shut with the "V"!

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Review by LittleBlackDuck posted 01-05-2020 12:02 AM 1029 views 1 time favorited 15 comments Add to Favorites Watch
Clamp it Shut with the "V"! Clamp it Shut with the "V"! Clamp it Shut with the "V"! Click the pictures to enlarge them

Boys and Girls,

Before you venture further, some of the following text may be questionable to some… If you are sensitive, please exit now and don’t go crying to Cricket because of your forthcoming curiosity.

Initially, I was anxious to pass on my brainwashing, however, was concerned about my tenure here at LJ due to some blaspheming about sideways picture… Staying on top, and determined not to be under turd… I am pressing on… though it may earn a “go to jail” from the publishers.

If your base your measurements on your man-hood (preferably blokes… how’s that for gender equality… oh PIC [Political InCorrectness]), don’t make the mistake I did and when I thought I was ordering 3’ long clamps, I finished up with 6’ ones… and ‘cording to the missus, using that philosophy, I would been lucky to be able to clamp two matchsticks together with my order.

I purchase 4 of these Bessey Revo KREV clamps…

The ”V” stands for moVable head in Hungarian, and there’s no English translation for it… so don’t develop piles looking up your thesaurus.
One (the personal one and not the numeric one) should always order clamps in pairs (now numeric, not personal) and as I bought a pair… well do the sums.

The first thing you may notice about Bessey clamps is that they are much (well a tad) more expensive than other branded ones, however, before you make accusation of off the same production lines, consider the notches in the shaft. Not all are the same…

Be$$ey (and maybe the better other$) wrap around the sides.

and then the cheap German imports…

c’mon… just gagging about German... my compensation for my prior “Jap” reference somewhere else.
Would people be less offended if I replaced German with Indian... the Germans probably!
You get what you pay for… Be$$ey clamps.

What struck me with these clamps was the option to move ahead (or was it to move the head)… damn English.. the next review (if I manage) will be in Hungry-Swahilly
Oh while on the topic of moving the head… emblaze two tenets in your brain,
  1. Don’t forget to push that button ALL the way in

    neglect may result in a few broken mallets as the headstock will refuse to move… if only to prove the Be$$ey are robust.
  2. Remove all packaging residue… especially those bleeding sticky tapes on the shaft used to secure the items for shipping. (No pictures as it has been removed and I refuse to put more back on just for your edification… sorry.)

A lot of this review now boils down to your efficiency in glue-ups. If you never panic, get in a tiz or have Titebond dripping from your hair, waste no more time here…. a pause for all the exiters and Titebond’s comission postage. Cheeze, call them Tite...

If you are like me and go to great extents for premature set-up and eventually be faced with freckles when the shit hits the fan and everything falls apart as you setup totally disintegrates while dabbing on that ever quick “slow-drying” glue dries, takes centre stage. C’mon… I’ll play Friday on any day of the week… as I’m certainly not Robinson Crusoe here.

Let’s analyse. You set up your clamps, measure the anticipated sizes and start to apply glue..

That bloody clamp drops, moves, goes walkabouts or whatever Polatis position it prefers other than what it was instructed to,

exacerbated by the addition of another clamp (and yet there’s two more to come),

now all the smartie pants out there will say, the duck has all sized clamps… The Duck has all sized clamps!... au contraire mes amis et ennemis … I am always short of the size I NEED!... HAVE and NEED are spelt different… even in the poor Hungarian fern cutter’s dictionary (long story)!

Move the clamp, cuss as it will remember its last position, and kick the poor dog only cause it didn’t buy you a Be$$ey KREV clamp for Christmas.

Now that same canine, traded in his bones, to get his “bitch” of a master some better clamps.

Set it up by centering the jaws… they are balanced… do the other direction… still in place…

Now all good reviews should stop here, however, this is a better review…

The clamps function great, however, if you are a Bessey addict, those cheap skates did not imprint directions on any of their REVO clamps and you MUST familiarise yourself with movement in order to not finish up red faced while closing during final glue up…
Also the movable head allows the shaft to extrude and it will not sit flat on the floor… much like an alcohol infected duck!

Hey, I’ve only had them for a few hours and they’ve fallen over twice as many times as I have… They have this propensity to gravitate… with a BANG!

And for hell’s sake… protect your midriff from those, now long extrusive, shafts… both ends (depending on setup)...

they’re like a warm knife through an ample belly!

Damn, I need more clamp racks to store the blasted things.

-- If your first cut is too short... Take the second cut from the longer end... LBD




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LittleBlackDuck

3428 posts in 1427 days



15 comments so far

View Dutchy's profile

Dutchy

3508 posts in 2775 days


#1 posted 01-05-2020 10:48 AM

V. How about Variabel (German) or Variable in english?

These V clamps are still difficult to use on a wall mounted workbench.

Thanks Alex for this review, but I hope you can forgive me that I didn’t read the hole story?

-- https://dutchypatterns.com/

View splintergroup's profile

splintergroup

3207 posts in 1829 days


#2 posted 01-05-2020 03:20 PM

I’ve seen replacement heads for Bessys that have tempted me to cut off the nibs on the shaft that hold the fixed heads in place and instead having two adjustable jaws on a single clamp. No price listed, but I’d assume they would cost more than a complete new clamp….

View LittleBlackDuck's profile

LittleBlackDuck

3428 posts in 1427 days


#3 posted 01-05-2020 04:12 PM


.... a wall mounted workbench….
- Dutchy

I’ve always had trouble mounting my workbench on the wall…. but then again, I haven’t got a spivvy black and orange work shed (eat your hearts out non-Dutch infidels).

..... but I hope you can forgive me that I didn t read the hole story?
- Dutchy

Forgiven…. Now go back and READ IT ALL!

.... but I’d assume they would cost more than a complete new clamp….
- splintergroup

Wouldn’t replace my existing clamps and I haven’t put these new ones through the mill.. yet… however, I could foresee their benefit and thought I’d mention it for others’ benefit… From my limited experience (so far) I would probably migrate to these for future purchases… ‘tleast till auntie bleeding Be$$esy invents something newer and more expensive.
Unfortunately I put far too much value on convenience.

-- If your first cut is too short... Take the second cut from the longer end... LBD

View Dutchy's profile

Dutchy

3508 posts in 2775 days


#4 posted 01-05-2020 04:26 PM


Dutchy

Forgiven…. Now go back and READ IT ALL!

-LittleBlackDuck

Google has read it to me, is that okay?

-- https://dutchypatterns.com/

View LittleBlackDuck's profile

LittleBlackDuck

3428 posts in 1427 days


#5 posted 01-05-2020 04:52 PM


..... that okay?
- Dutchy
Een beetje oké, maar gewoon een beetje. Next time… no Google!

-- If your first cut is too short... Take the second cut from the longer end... LBD

View ShopCat's profile

ShopCat

121 posts in 4186 days


#6 posted 01-05-2020 06:51 PM

Popular woodworking says they fixed the head thing

https://www.popularwoodworking.com/tools/next-generation-bessey-revo-clamps-2/

So maybe time for a maintenance release (?)

You never answered me on the recent Oz/Kiwi/Bledso results so I looked them up. That’s pretty bad. I would not do anything to antagonize anyone with Cricket in their name. I mean, contact sports are obviously not recommended and what have you got left.

-- ShopCat

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ShopCat

121 posts in 4186 days


#7 posted 01-05-2020 06:59 PM

My bad. Forgot that I actually asked robscastle about the game. Same principles still apply.

-- ShopCat

View LittleBlackDuck's profile

LittleBlackDuck

3428 posts in 1427 days


#8 posted 01-05-2020 10:25 PM



https://www.popularwoodworking.com/tools/next-generation-bessey-revo-clamps-2/
- ShopCat

Damn… more reading! At least it could’ve been a video!

The jury’s still out so I’ll have to wait for them to bring back my clamps.

Never has issues with my old REVOs… but then again I only use 1,699 lbs of force with them… hell, it’s that extra 1 pound that shows in the bathroom mirror.


My bad. Forgot that I actually asked robscastle about the game. Same principles still apply.
- ShopCat

I think he spat the dummy with me… haven’t received any abusive PM’s from him for the last 10 minutes… and I am privately informed it’s his geese buddies that have been “spotting” my solar panels…. Nevertheless, I will pass on your message… or pass over it.

PS. He’s a banana bender and can’t spell Bledislo either, hence no reply… just pulling your tail!
We don’t have any Eric Bledsoe playing in our Churchill netball team… basketball is reserved for us basket cases here…

-- If your first cut is too short... Take the second cut from the longer end... LBD

View ShopCat's profile

ShopCat

121 posts in 4186 days


#9 posted 01-06-2020 02:24 AM

I just typed in ‘all blacks bled’ and the game results appeared. Search predicates seem strongly correlated. Here ‘bouts the news all says the whole place is burning down. How bad is it?

-- ShopCat

View LittleBlackDuck's profile

LittleBlackDuck

3428 posts in 1427 days


#10 posted 01-06-2020 03:44 AM


.... How bad is it?
- ShopCat

Thx for asking…

A few years ago… before me and my neighbor couldn’t afford carports,
it burned close but quickly.

This time its about 140K away but the smoke has been building up for days/weeks… at 11:00am the skylight in the kitchen was playing hookey… At 3:00pm I was just about looking for those carports,

crowie PM’d me about getting our smoke on his New Zealand holiday (‘bout 2,600K across the ditch)... crows will pilfer anything.

GO FIERIES!... we thank youze all and owe you heaps.

-- If your first cut is too short... Take the second cut from the longer end... LBD

View pottz's profile

pottz

7696 posts in 1591 days


#11 posted 01-06-2020 08:29 PM

now even though im mostly german ive taken no offence due to the fact you insult all nationalities on an equal bases.youve brought up some good points about theses clamps and the base system that would certainly come in quite handy many times im gluing up.if i only had the high tech duck money you do id be out buying a dozen or two right now.

-- sawdust the bigger the pile the bigger my smile-larry,so cal.

View LittleBlackDuck's profile

LittleBlackDuck

3428 posts in 1427 days


#12 posted 01-07-2020 12:28 AM



....if i only had the high tech duck money you do id be out buying a dozen or two right now.
- pottz

Simply fixed… buy a good inkjet printer and print your own…

Alternatively… always have a plan B
Enroll in a computer course and buy yourself some punched cards…

and of course migrate to a country that doesn’t have just mouldy old greenbacks… You may not be rich but you’ll look it and if you fill your wallet… you’ll be sitting much higher.

-- If your first cut is too short... Take the second cut from the longer end... LBD

View pottz's profile

pottz

7696 posts in 1591 days


#13 posted 01-07-2020 12:37 AM


....if i only had the high tech duck money you do id be out buying a dozen or two right now.
- pottz

Simply fixed… buy a good inkjet printer and print your own…

Alternatively… always have a plan B
Enroll in a computer course and buy yourself some punched cards…

and of course migrate to a country that doesn t have just mouldy old greenbacks… You may not be rich but you ll look it and if you fill your wallet… you ll be sitting much higher.

- LittleBlackDuck

funny a few years back a guy got busted doing just that,and it was the same printer i had! the money is a little more sophisticated now though.

-- sawdust the bigger the pile the bigger my smile-larry,so cal.

View LittleBlackDuck's profile

LittleBlackDuck

3428 posts in 1427 days


#14 posted 01-07-2020 02:32 AM



.... little more sophisticated now though.
- pottz

Yeah… ya gotta buy a colored laser now days and the price of toner is a bitch.

-- If your first cut is too short... Take the second cut from the longer end... LBD

View James E McIntyre's profile

James E McIntyre

569 posts in 1899 days


#15 posted 01-23-2020 08:08 PM

Clamps, have some use them, wish I had more.

-- James E McIntyre

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