Dave Talks #14: Just can't seem to get after it... I really need to get things going...

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Blog entry by dbhost posted 08-03-2018 09:25 PM 4279 reads 0 times favorited 5 comments Add to Favorites Watch
« Part 13: Taking a break from the shop, and videos for a lousy reason... Part 14 of Dave Talks series Part 15: Almost beyond words. Went to the shop, and couldn't move... What now? »

If you follow my blog you know, 2018 has been a tough year for our family. We’ve suffered extensive loss of a couple of cousins, an aunt, a good friend, my wifes brother, and my Dad…

Since Dad passed, I haven’t had any sort of, well desire to do anything in the shop. I mean I have gone to the shop, turned the AC on, sat down and started after maybe cleaning up a tiny bit, or just moving things around. But nothing of any consequence. Certainly not making headway…

I look around my shop, and I remember my Dads shop. I can’t tell you how many times I have stood there at my lathe just remembering sitting on my Dads workbench and watching him turn legs for a cobblers bench. How he would come home stressed out from work, and as the shavings would start to pile up, you could see a change, he was happy.

I remember talking with him as I put my shop together. He really hated routers. I mean with a passion. No idea why. I don’t even recall him owning one. Not sure what I would do without mine!

It’s funny. When we were visiting with my step mom, and she was, well clearing stuff out, and trying to clear her head, I remember her asking me if I knew anything about this little boot shaped candle holder. While I don’t have any recollection of him making it, just like with someone’s handwriting, I could see my Dads hand all over that thing. It must have been made probably sometime in the late 80s before he hung up woodworking in favor of other pursuits that didn’t take up as much space…

I haven’t really produced much, if anything of note, aside from a few gift items, and such for my wife…. and a few pieces for the house. I am hoping, and praying that once the dust settles, maybe, just maybe, I can dig in, get serious, and get some woodworking done. But for now, I’m just not ready to get after it.

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5 comments so far

View robscastle's profile


7194 posts in 2974 days

#1 posted 08-04-2018 12:11 AM

Hello Dave,
A touching post and a very sad series of events to have to handle all at once.

Death of a father/close relative/partner is something that we will never really stop greiving for, I guess its just human nature.

Also I cannot offer any text book advice either, it’s something we all have to handle in our own way.
Your shop visits are possiblly good a good step in the right direction only you will know the answer there.
Like your Dad a change in direction may help for a period.

I will however check back on you later.

-- Regards Rob

View dbhost's profile


5777 posts in 4002 days

#2 posted 08-04-2018 02:20 AM

Thanks Rob I really appreciate that. I’m not saying I’m going to be making any radical changes anytime soon. Dad passed just under a month ago. The progression of his illness was very very fast which in a way is a blessing. I watched my brother-in-law slowly deteriorate in the matter of 3 years that he was sick and it was a very difficult thing for him and for the family.

My earlier post was actually while I was waiting for some things to happen at work systems restarting that kind of thing. It really didn’t take long I just felt like I had to get it off my chest somewhere. The good thing is it’s not impacting my day job sort of. I know my mind isn’t quite what it should be I’m very distracted and considering my career which is senior systems engineering as in I’m the guy that lays out the information technology infrastructure, it’s been much much harder for me to do my job effectively this year. Solutions that would be simple for me to figure out normally just evade me right now and it’s starting to get worrisome. I am very glad my management is very understanding of the situation

Unless my wife redirects me tomorrow I’m planning on taking a little trip to the other side of town to pick up a used Weber kettle Grill. I am planning on building a folding barbecue table for it. The doctor has me on a Paleo Diet and barbecuing is an easy way to stay on plan. I already have one 22in Grill I just wanted to the second one so that I can do larger Cooks such as smoking a brisket on one and grilling vegetables on the other at the same time time.

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View Frustrator's profile


93 posts in 1820 days

#3 posted 08-04-2018 04:52 AM

Hi Dave,
Sorry to hear about all your and your familys losses
Just a tips, take it if helps you, otherwise just discard it. What have helped me when ive been in similar situation is to keep the body moving alot. Earlier in life it was running, now just walking alot (to much nice food). The moving makes it easier to think.


View Jim Bertelson's profile

Jim Bertelson

4275 posts in 3935 days

#4 posted 08-04-2018 03:14 PM

I think you are doing remarkedly well, Dave, considering everything that has happened. We have talked about grieving before so won’t rehash it. Being episodic in the shop is probably the norm. There are some people that get the bug, and just never stop. But I tend to bounce from one hobby to another.

Right now I am not doing much in the shop. I went through a long siege of power washing this house (and everything else but the grass), and then did the same thing in La Conner. That was a mistake. My scoliosis and calcified facet, both diagnosed at age 6, is an infirmity I have to protect. I didn’t realize that with the power washer, I was duplicating something I don’t normally do… pivoting and walking slowly. Strangely, I can walk fast or nearly run without any discomfort or exacerbation of my issues on the right side. But when I walk slowly, apparently I use different muscles. With fast walking, I tense a lot of muscles that then protect my weak spot, I suspect

My issues with slow walking has one side benefit, I never go shopping with my wife… (-:

So now I have to avoid standing as much as I can, so I revert to computer related hobbies. I actually have a pile of projects to post, but I have been delinquent. I built a lot of things last year, on a time schedule, and that burnt me out for awhile.

I have some small projects in the works in La Conner, and there, woodworking continues to be an active hobby.

I just purchased and assembled a new gas grill. My twenty year old Weber Genesis finally gave up the ghost. I would have to completely replace everything in the firebox, and I considered it, but then I noted that it was rusting in other areas as well. It has already gone through two sets of innards. Time to replace instead of repair.

I got another three burner Genesis, now called the Genesis II. I got the model with a stainless steel top, side shelves, grates, burners, and everything else in the firebox. But it isn’t the much more expensive “LX” model that has side burners that I would never use. With three burners, I can roast a chicken, cornish game hen, or a pork roast, for instance. You turn off the middle burner, and it works more like a convection oven. I grill about 2 to 3 times a week year round.

Because we get heavy snows at times. the porch can end up with a lot of snow. The grill has 8” wheels on one end, and casters on the other. I replaced the casters with 8 inch wheels on an axel. I don’t need the swivelling, but I do need to drag it a few feet through snow to use it.

Well, off and running, just keep on plugging along…

-- Jim, Anchorage Alaska

View dbhost's profile


5777 posts in 4002 days

#5 posted 08-05-2018 02:14 AM

I’ve seen the Genesis, great grill, but honestly, I am a big and somewhat odd fan of the classic Weber Kettle grill. Just something oddly enjoyable about a charcoal or wood fired BBQ… Actually as I type, I have Chicken Breast Fajitas and peppers on the grill… I already did ribs and elotes (Mexican Street corn). Tomorrow is supposed to be rainy, so I am getting it in now…

I didn’t expect losing Dad to be easy, and it isn’t. I also didn’t expect to go through the losses we have this year. I fully expect one more this year as my father in law is in pretty rough shape at 86.

I spent some time in the shop tonight, just cleaning and sorting. Nothing impressive to say the least. I have work to do in the kitchen that is falling behind, I just, well, haven’t felt up to anything. So nothing is what has gotten done!

I have some things I just can’t keep putting off. Rip out hte kitchen sink, disposal, and drain plumbing, replace with a new unit that has been sitting there forever. Repair th ewater damaged bottom of the cabinets and move forward with the refinishing of the cabinets. We are using Rustoleum transformations in the kitchen, to get a better look. THe countertops are more or less funky, but usable enough for now. I am trying to talk my wife into letting me do real maple / walnut butcher block countertops instead of hte junk stuff the builder put in…

Wallpaper stripping, I have found is one of my least favorite things. I would rather replace the wax ring on a toilet than strip wallpaper. It is certainly less painful!

Oh on the BBQ thing…. I have the ribs holding in the oven right now, which means the whole house smells like Pecan smoked BBQ ribs… I am suprised my neighbors aren’t knocking on the door!

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